I am not a notebook kind of girl. I don't write down my thoughts on paper, although maybe I should. Instead, I usually use my blog as a form of self-expression and even self-communication. Yes, I like to "type" my thoughts. It is faster and easier for me to focus on the essential, and not on how readable my handwriting is.
Today is one of those days when I really feel like pouring my heart out to you guys and talk about why I am happy I quit my first retail job, with hopes to also find out about your own personal experiences similar to mine.
So, without further ado, here's what I have to say. I have recently obtained my first retail student job. Although I have previously applied for similar shop assistant jobs, I was not successful, despite my professional experience.
All my life, I have tried to work as hard as I could in order to gain as much experience as possible: I was a volunteer, I did charity events, I worked in fancy offices, served food and drinks to people and cleaned floors (even toilets, yep). I went through it all, in hopes to become a more fulfilled person, ready for the real adulthood life. To this day, I believe every single one of my experiences have led me to where I am now, pushing me forward, while teaching me the art of being a genuine person, a good human being. However, none of the above mentioned experiences (including my education) have made me eligible for a retail job, until recently when I finally got the YES call following my interview with a huge retailer in the UK (maybe the largest). I am not going to mention any names, in order to avoid any suspicion of a potential sponsored post, because this is not what this post is.
I am writing this because I have just gone through one of the most eye-opening experiences of my life. I QUIT my job, before even starting it. I quit during the induction, after only 2 hours. But this doesn't make me a QUITTER!
I can't possibly express the amount of thoughts that were running through my head as I was going through the company introduction process. I left my house this morning with the most positive and enthusiastic attitude one can possibly have. Almost as if I would start my 1st day of school once again. Somehow, as soon as I got to work, I felt like I was slowly losing my mind. I couldn't focus anymore and I kept asking myself if this is really what would make me happy. Sure, it would mean I could earn some pocket money to help me out throughout these final months of university, but would it really make me happy? The answer was obvious to me and as soon as I dared to admit it, I took off.
It would have surely not made me happy. It was a weekend job, meaning all of my free time would be gone, time that is definitely not free. I have the busiest time of my life at university right now, and any moment wasted will cost me. Any unhappy moment wasted will cost me even more.
I am not willing to sacrifice my time anymore in order to be able to say that I "started from the bottom". I have done that already, more than 5 years ago, and I can't go back. I believe we should always strive to evolve, to move forward in our personal and professional lives. The job I would have started today, would have certainly not helped me with that. It would have only made me more frustrated and disappointed with myself.
Sure, I made it through the interview and that was really great for my ego. But I can do more. I am more confident than ever now, and I encourage you all to keep fighting for your dreams and not settle for the safe options, no matter how convenient they might seem at a certain moment. I know my budget is slowly finishing and as much as I would need some extra cash, I want to also be happy. I want to follow my dreams and eventually create a team and an environment that people will not want to leave after 2 hours.
So today I made a promise to myself, as cheesy as this may sound. I promised to never lose focus again and always eliminate from my life any factors that would make me lose focus. As much as I love fashion and working with people, I am made for the digital world. I love everything about the online medium and its limitless opportunities and I am sure I can combine all of my passions while still being able to work online. But I don't want to find the ideal job for myself. I want to create it! And I will never settle for less, even though that would imply having to live on a shoestring budget.
What do you think guys? I did question myself whether people would judge me for this or not. But eventually I understood that I know better than anyone that this was the right choice for me. This is why I decided to write this post, hoping to inspire you to really ask yourselves if what you are doing now really makes you happy? If it doesn't, why are you still willing to compromise your wellbeing?
Put everything in balance and make sure you are completely happy with your decisions! I know I am. #selfconfidence
Photo by my dear friend from Amsterdam whom I really miss, Alexandra Blanco.